Awful things happen to all of us always. But when awful things happen to us on the roads, where everyone is in a mortal hurry to get home or to office, things can actually get quite ugly. You don’t even dare to think about certain embarrassing things that can happen on the roads. Here are just a few of them.
03. Car breaking down in traffic
Oh the dreaded rush hours when everyone goes crazy on the roads! People toot their horns at each other, make ridiculous attempts to overtake each other and often say really very nasty things to each other. You join this insane party and chirpily toot your horn, blissfully burn with anger and put your driving skills to the test by trying to angrily overtake the slowest vehicle on the road. And suddenly everyone stops in their tracks as the red light starts burning bright.
There is a hush as everyone waits impatiently for the slow pedestrians to cross. You wait all revved up for the red light to turn green. But alas! As soon as the green light appears you realize something is wrong with your vehicle and that it will not move. You try to start again, again and again. But your stubborn vehicle refuses to budge. You start hearing people tooting their horns at you now. You see people glare at you and gesture with their hands as they pass you now. You see a silly man has got his vehicle stuck behind yours now. You try desperately to find out what is wrong.
And when every attempt fails, you get down from your car and start pushing it to the side hoping to goodness that no one you know will pass you by.
02. Shoe breaking on the roads
You love yourself in the morning. You dress yourself, adorn yourself and lovingly prepare yourself to face the challenges of the day. You feel good in the morning. You wear your pointy heels and inspect yourself with great approval in the mirror before stepping out of your house in to the busy streets.
As you walk by elegantly you enjoy the looks you get and you feel like a supermodel in her prime. Yes the dusty streets become your catwalk. You keep walking with the wind in your hair listening to the rhythmic tick tock of your shoe until you hear not a tick nor a tock but a “crack”. You now realize that your pointy heel is not so pointy anymore. Your stylish supermodel walk is now replaced by a “nondi kakula nikan kakula” walk. You stop in your tracks as you see every single Tom, Dick and Harry staring at you and your shoe.
You look around to see if a cobbler is around because you remember seeing cobblers everywhere, everyday. But they will not be there for you when you need them the most, trust me. You will have to deal with this all by yourself.
01. When birds 💩 on you
Little children might read this so I will censor one word (but don’t worry, you will know what it is).
People in Sri Lanka love birds. They love to feed the birds. They think birds are innocent creatures doing absolutely no harm to anyone.
Oh but they are wrong!
Birds are clever.
Birds watch you always.
Birds perch on trees and drop their “cargo” right on top of your head. You hear a soft plop and you cautiously feel your head to have your suspicious confirmed. It is bird “…” alright. You fumble around in your purse trying to find tissue or a handkerchief but all you want to do is rush home and stand under the shower for 2 hours straight. But since you need to save your “leave” for Christmas, you grudgingly go to work and make sure nobody stands around too close to you and TRY to get on with your day.