Sri Lankan couples; evolution from lovers to married

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Romance, amore, love and ‘adaraya’ all these words coincide with couples and lovers. What happens to those lovers when they get married? ‘adare passe doren yanawa’ – the love just diminishes or stagnates? is that true? Does it happen? Let’s look at the typical evolution of a normal Sri Lankan Couple.

1. Love-Birds Stage

When it comes to Sri Lankan couples, as it has been made evident through many Sinhala songs, initially the local couples are like ‘love birds’ during the early stage of their romance. They are even willing to eat ‘Lunui Bathui’. They spend the entire day mooning away on their lovers words, even the slightest change in tone and behaviour is taken as offence. The guy is more than willing to purchase the entire rose supply at a flower store to make his significant other go all ‘wow’.

2. Comfy-Lovers’ Stage

Then comes the comfy-lovers stage, where sometimes he may forget to call and check if you had lunch. But it’s nothing to be afraid of surely, by now you are engaged and pretty much boring everyone surrounding you with your urges to gape at whatever ‘bridal’ pic you see and both of you spend your weekends visiting the never ending supply of ‘wedding fairs’ to get an idea on ‘wedding planning’.

3. Newly Married Stage

Obviously after all that planning comes the ‘Wedding’ where you spend all of your savings, but end at the ‘newly married’ stage. You want everyone around you to join the club. Marriage is the ‘it’! Its what you have been waiting for the whole of your life. Everything from sleeping together to eating together, you are sharing and caring. A kiss on the forehead before he leaves for work, and she impatiently wait to put the kettle on when he returns in the eve.

4. Baby-On the way Stage

As the next door aunty has been taking you to the 4th floor CID type questioning on your baby plans, you finally get preggers. It’s the time to get pampered and the first time is the best. Everybody keenly awaits the ‘fruit of your limbs’. They even offer you FOC advices. He is over the moon. Feels the impending responsibility.

5. Post one/two kids stage

He sleeps in the next room because the baby(ies) need to be close to mommy at night and day. You randomly have a conversation and that consists of ‘electricity bills, shopping and school exhibitions’.

6. Kids are now grown-up stage

Finally, the circle completes and the kids leave the nest. You are back in each other’s face. If in the long years of stage 4 you survived each other, then you are going to hold on till one of you rests-in-peace. You will reinvent love. Start waiting for him/her to return home from somewhere, and start wondering what happened to all those early years?

So, that is the full cycle of Sri Lankan love life in our point of view. Any contradictions guys? Leave your comments.

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Written by Hansi

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A dreamer by day and night; Hansi believes in the power of words. Poetry is her medium; in her happiness and sadness both, she uses her lines to deliver her soul.
'After all, I am my own being;
with my own mind,
that hides deep;
below my ocean of thoughts...' - Hansi

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